40. Eating Competition

40.  Eating Competition

with guest challenger Scott and leftover clearer Lotti

The discussion about which eating challenge to do was an incredibly long and sometimes heated one.  I tried long and hard to get Anett to agree to a two foot sausage roll but she was having none of it!

Anett: Can't we just go out and buy a bucket of chicken each and time how long it takes to eat it?
Phil:  No because I don't like meat on the bone and there is no free t-shirt at stake.

In the end we settled on the Infamous Beast Burger Challenge at the Clapham North, mainly because it was near us and we didn't have to sign any waivers.  We'd not seen the burger in question but knew it would contain a chicken breast and pulled pork as well as a regular beef burger, and 'its own weight in hand cut chips'.  Oh and it had to be eaten within a time limit of 12 minutes.  How hard could that be?

We adopted fairly different preparation strategies: Anett ate a decent breakfast and an early lunch and then fasted; Scott only ate apples for most of the day; I had a pub lunch and a fair few biscuits over the course of the afternoon.  All of us were united in one thing though: by dinner time, we were all starving!

HUNGRY!

As the food came down in the lift, we all craned our necks to see whether the waitress would manage to carry all three burgers in.  She could not carry all three burgers.  Uh oh!

The Infamous Beasts

The waitress told us that only one girl had ever attempted the challenge before and she had failed miserably.  All of the serving staff seemed to remember the one guy who had completed the challenge.  If we cleared our plates in the 12 minutes (they weren't too fussed about the salad garnish) we would join that guy on the wall of fame and earn ourselves a free drink.  High stakes!  

Man vs Food

We were told that the best tactic was to get through the chips first and then attack the burger, but when the timer started none of us could resist the urge to go straight for the meat.  Scott recoiled in horror when he realised that there was not only a tomato, but also a mushroom in the burger!  There was also a bonus slice of bacon and melted cheese in there.

The Beast close up

The pulled pork was succulent, the beef cooked perfectly.  The chicken breast nearly killed me and turned out to be hiding a gherkin, aargh!

At 6 minutes gone, it was clear that Anett was never getting through her mammoth pile of chips.  Scott and I were still in it but he was starting to struggle.

At 9 minutes Scott looked tired.  I was our only hope and still going strong.

The 11th minute crept up on me much faster than expected and I was frantically shoving as much of the bun as I could in my mouth when the time was over.  Gutted.

Time over!  Our finished plates (clockwise from top left: Phil, Anett, Scott)

The waitress declared me the winner and while I didn't make the hall of fame, she did get me a free drink which helped to soothe my wounded pride.  I'd made a promise to myself to finish even if it took longer than the time so took my time on the remaining 5 chips.  Lotti swept up Anett's leftovers and still couldn't get anywhere close to the finish.  Scott continued to stare at the mushroom.

Victory drink (sort of)

GIN!

Leftovers proving too much for Lotti

The closest we came to a clear plate

Eating competition list trumps!

Cost: 4/5 (£20 for literally all you can eat is pretty good value)

Originality: 3/5 (people do this all the time but not many of them are size 8 women)

Fun factor: 3/5 (entertaining, delicious for about 5 minutes, painful for the remaining 7 and some serious food baby repercussions were suffered by all)